So I was working with the Spandex King on a family/description/random unit. I’m confused about what the theme was. But at some point it turned into descriptions. I’m just going to put it out there that I’m really bad at describing people in English. I tend to describe people by “fat, skinny, tall, and not tall” and then usually what they are wearing. I don’t properly utilise the English language. Anyways the SK is the same age as my dad (mid 50s) but I thought he was like 70 for the longest time until he randomly told me what year he was born, which was kind of a weird conversation. The fact that hes 55ish and I thought he was 70 should tell you something.
So we had just revised the descriptor words (big, small, tall, thin, fat, ugly, beautiful, old, young) and then SK looks at me and goes “describe me.” I was like oh no… Because how do you be polite when you call someone old? So because I’m horrifyingly awkward sometimes, I go “well um you are tall…i guess… um you have blue eyes… um and you are wearing a red sweater and black shoes” He looks at me and goes “that was actually horrible” well gee thanks…
Then one of the students start to describe him and the student goes “you have white hair” to which he FREAKED out. He was like, “WHITE HAIR!!!! I DO NOT HAVE WHITE HAIR!!! Meaghan what color is my hair??” which to be honest, his hair is that weird blonde/gray/white color that happens once you turn 50 and you were blonde back in the day. So what do you say to someone who might be in denial about their age?
The SK is staring at me and I’m just standing there like WHAT THE HELL DO I DO, so because I’m awkward, I stuttered out “um maybe it is kind of sorta whiteish grayish blonde?” Then I realized he didn’t understand my butchering of English “kind of sorta wihiteish” meant nothing to him because those are words and expressions he has never heard. All he heard was “blonde” and that was all he needed to hear. He goes “see class? I am not old, I am beautiful with blonde hair! Strong too!”
If you say so Spandex King, if you say so.